Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
