maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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