weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
