I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
