you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
