is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
Randomize