Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
