why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
Randomize
