This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
My vagina is officially offended.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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