BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize
