wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
PS: I just woke up from my shower
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Randomize