East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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