hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
Randomize