You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
