when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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