pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
You're completely useless in the revolution.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
