hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
