Too much gin, very little bucket
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
