I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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