he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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