I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
