you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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