i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
