It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
