Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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