He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
