Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
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