Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Randomize
