i permit you to call me
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
