p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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