Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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