It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
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