You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
