Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
Randomize
