from now on my penis is your penis
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I just had sex on a roof
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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