hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
