I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
