Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
