you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
