ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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