I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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