Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize