So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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