I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
