I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
It's only ok to pee out the window in the afternoon when you're drunk.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize