Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
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