we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
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