no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
