need another drink. this is the easiest way
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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