let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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