kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Randomize
