You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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